It comes in many fashions: a quick walk outside, a snack, renting a movie, cooking up something nice, etc. I rarely work so hard that I forget to treat myself. But sometimes when work requires a bit more, the delights of the day come around a bit less.
I didn’t even realize it had happened until Matty texted me from work on Friday, saying simply, “I want to date you. Let’s go out.”
Sick, nursing a sore throat and a headache, I’d been on the couch all day working. But the tinge of excitement in my gut overtook the pain in my body and suddenly I didn’t want to look at a screen again for a very long time. I was caught in a rut and I didn’t even realize it.
You may be in this boat. You may not even know that you are in this boat. Allow me to help, with 4 surprising times to pause and treat yo self:
When you’re paying off debt. My immediate thought was, “We can’t afford a date night!” Matty and I are ravenously going after credit card debt and school loans, and for the first time since we got married 7 months ago, we’re making some strides. But then I thought about what we lose by not going out - quality time together, trying new things, making new memories, investing in one another - I wanted all of those things. So we made it work. We sold some old clothes to a resale shop, sold my old iPhone on Craigslist, and hit happy hour food specials instead of paying full price. Paying off debt is kinda like a diet - if you deny yourself too much, one day you’ll full out binge on all the candy (aka buy all the clothes). Reward yourself here and there in a way that keeps you on track toward the goal.
When you’ve seen too many movies. We love to rent movies. It’s the best. But as much as I love couch time with Matty, conversations with Matty are what keeps our relationship vibrant. I did this when I was single, too. Hulu and Netflix, I love you, but this is one reward that will put you in a rut.
When you need to work on your passion project. “We can’t go on a date - I need to write!” Practically every time I get invited to a social event, I think about how that means less time to work on my blog. Guys, I love this blog a lot, but it’s not going to be very good if I have no life experience to bring to it. I think that’s true for any art. Creating when you are full is when the magic happens.
When you need to clean the house. Just leave. Seriously. You’ll get to it eventually.
What are your tell-tale signs that it's time for a refresh?