The Question We All Ask Ourselves

The Question We All Ask Ourselves via All the Delights

There is a question I’ve been turning over in my mind over the last month or so. I’m willing to bet that it’s one you’ve asked yourself, as well, perhaps in your own language or understanding:

“What do I want to say?”

Simple. Harmless. And rather heavy.

First, it was an inkling. A feeling that something wasn’t sitting right in my life; as if I were looking through the lens of an old prescription. And then it began to swell in my spirit until I could hear the voice clearly in my head asking, encouraging, longing to know -

“What do I want to say?”

I believe strongly in the metaphor of seasons. Life ebbs and flows from one to the next and it’s funny how the excitement of a beginning often wanes over time. We long for summer for it’s warmth and fun, then before we know it we’re ready to cozy up in the fall. But I find beauty and comfort in this thought. There is something to love about every season on earth, as in every season of life. So as one ends, a new one begins. It’s a goodbye and hello all at once.

The Question We All Ask Ourselves via All the Delights
The Question We All Ask Ourselves via All the Delights

As the winds have changed and the trees begin to shed their leaves, so I am following suite. I’m a fan of change, generally, and I’m entering a new season of my life with the strategic notion of finding out a meaningful next step. For me, that means really digging into my heart and my faith and discovering what is produced out of the overflow.

I picked up my guitar yesterday for the first time in months. I hummed a few lines and found some pretty melodies, but then the question came again. Where words used to come easy and swift, there were none that I could match with all the things I felt. But it was wonderful - I played. And that’s what mattered.

I’ve decided to make a few moves with the start of November. For one, I’m going to take a week or so off social media, besides any scheduled posts from All the Delights. I’m going to delete all the apps and let my brain have a few deep breaths. I’ll fill that time with writing, reading, getting outside, and letting myself think without distraction. I have a feeling that social media has made my vision cloudy and created noise that I can live without for awhile.

This morning I picked up my guitar again and a few words found their way out. I’m stretching an old muscle and it feels really good. I feel ready to find out not only what I want to say...but what I’m meant to say.

I’ll be elaborating more soon, but for now I want to know - how do you handle change? Do you also feel a need to “readjust” with every new season?

Images by MJC